day #19: janeane garafolo

i just want to start this off by saying - if you would have told me that janeane garafolo would have something to do with the transition into my thirties, i would have said - what? but also at the same time "well, i mean i get it." because why not? why wouldn't janeane garafolo factor into my birthday? life is weird like that.

i thought that growing up in LA would make me way cooler about encountering celebs. but it didn't. at all. sometimes i get nervous, and then i act like i'm all cool and like "whatever" which probably means i come off not cool and like "whatever" and i actually come off like a douche or like i'm too good for them. or shy and quiet. or a snob. maybe it's all in my head and no one is actually thinking anything about me at all because they're too busy thinking about themselves. but the point is, i get nervous.

when i was 22, i had a terrible experience with bruce willis. i was young and it may or may not have involved quite a bit of wine (spoiler alert: it did). my friends were in a band and they had a hotel cabana at the roosevelt hotel in LA, which meant that you could party in your hotel room but also mingle amongst the bar patrons by the pool. so basically i thought i was the bees knees that night. paris hilton and lindsay lohan were there, and i was there too. and in my mind, that meant i could DEFINITELY go up to bruce willis and talk to him.

so i walk up to him and i tap him on the shoulder. and without even turning around he gives me the "wait a minute" index finger. now, any normal person would have walked away at this point - but i was committed. it was bruce willis! so i hung around, clinging to a poolside heater, waiting for him to finish his story and talk to me. so he finally turns around surprised that i'm still there, and says gruffly:"what." and it was at that moment, i realized i had no idea what i wanted to say to bruce willis. i didn't even really like him all that much. i'd never seen die hard. in fact, i think the only thing i'd seen him in was the sixth sense. and at that moment, i wished i was a dead person he couldn't see. so i blurted out the only thing i could think of:

"um. i just want to tell you i think you're fabulous."

"thanks," he said as we shook hands, and i retreated back to my friends, laughing and humiliated. but at 3am when i thought it would also be a good idea to invite paris hilton to our cabana, i remembered bruce "wait a minute finger" willis, and decided against it. lessons!

my friend kerri hosts an amazingly funny internet show called "geeking out"where she interviews her favorite celebs and geeks out all over them. which is very similar to my own behavior, except for i don't have an internet show because that would involve celebrity interaction and well, bruce willis incident. one of the celebs she interviewed was janeane garafolo, so kerri had invited me to see her perform at a storytelling show in brooklyn called "jukebox." all of the performers were HYSTERICAL. seriously, if you have a chance to see this show - it was great and it was only $5, and it involves the performers telling a story and then karaoking a song that pertains to the story. genius.

Kerri with the poster for her show Geeking Out!

David Wain, performing a card trick story

Our lovely hosts for the evening - theme was Prom

 

Peter Krauss

janeane!

so after the show, kerri and i waited to say hi - but janeane got swept up in deep, deep conversation almost immediately with a girl that could have been her mirror image, armed with a notebook and a healthy dose of sarcasm. so we decided to catch janeane on her way out. as she was making a beeline for the exit, kerri called out "JANEANE" and waved her over. i shook her hand, and said it was nice to meet her, and how great the show was. and for my challenge, i was going to throw out all of my "too coolness" to ask her to take a picture with me. AND I TOTALLY FAILED. hahahaha. i could make all kinds of excuses about the fact that it was weird timing, she looked like she was in a hurry, she wanted to get out of there, blah blah. and kerri could totally back me up - or probably tell me i should have just taken the damn picture. but it turns out i STILL have things in my 20s that i can't seem to shake just yet. gaaaa. 

maybe it was for the best, maybe i avoided another bout of humiliation ala bruce willis. or maybe janeane's karaoke song was a taunt to the next time i come in contact with her.

either way, day 19 - complete!

xoxo

meags